Happy holidays, you fascists!
December 22, 2010
We here at The Catholic Fascist have taken some heat over the supposed misuse of the term “fascist.” (We think our “about us” page explains our usage quite nicely.) Our buddies and mentors over at The American Catholic have often been at the forefront of this quibble-fest, arguing that essentially any use of the terms “fascist” or “fascism” analogously is inappropriate. Sinful, even.
Until today! TAC’s chief ranter Joe Hargrave has finally come around and has decided to start throwing the word “fascist” around a little more liberally. In this post, he rightly condemns everyone who will not utter the words “Merry Christmas” at this holy time of year as a FASCIST! That’s right — Christians and non-Christians alike are fascists if they have a problem with the words “Merry Christmas.” And he is absolutely right.
So kudos to Joe for always speaking the truth, and now, for finally speaking our language! Holiday Birthday-of-the-White-Male-Imperial-Christ blessings upon Joe, The American Catholic, and to all of our readers, now and forever! The government shall be upon his shoulders, so let’s make that gov’t as small as possible in the new year, fellow patriots!
HAPPY VETERANS DAY!!!
November 11, 2010
On this day, one of our mostest holiest as American “fascist” Catholics, there is no better place to point your webby browsers than our brothers and sisters in Christ at The American Catholic, and particularly its principal author Ronald McClarney. The homage and worship that they display every day for our holy dead soldiers is truly remarkable and inspiring, but on a day like today they will surely go all out. Keep your eyes peeled and then let them weep tears of red, white, and blue. Thank you, TAC!
Catholic Fascists on the move on the Innernets
October 25, 2010
Kudos to the Huffington Post for highlighting the rise of Catholic fascist online activism! Although we are a little hurt that they did not include our modest little blog in their round-up.
We were pleased to learn of the efforts of some truly fascistic Roman Catholics in Boston in exposing the Marxist and pro-gay “Father” Bryan Hehir on this new blog. Their efforts are welcomed and truly important.
An articulate, brave, and masculine American Christian hero!
September 30, 2010
Liberal television journalist Anderson Cooper may have had fun attempting to make fun of Michigan Ass. Attorney General Andrew Shirvell’s brave stand against the homosexualistic invasion of college campuses symbolized in the pathetic student body figure of radical homosexualist activist and student Chris Armstrong. But indeed, it is Cooper who ends up looking like a fool as Shirvell’s brave and articulate defense of his mission speaks for itself. Shirvell’s clear mental superiority is seen in his refusal to even look at Cooper’s liberal camera lens as it persecutes such a brave and masculine Christian “fascist.” Shirvell has every right to use his free time to expose and combat the radical gay student agenda. He should be commended, and Catholic fascists everywhere are right to do so!
March for freedom, march for fear
September 17, 2010
After the great work done by servant of God Glenn Beck, this patriot is promoting a march we should go to. His name sounds a bit gay and french, but his message is Godly and muscular American:
“America, the Greatest Country God ever gave Man, was built on three bedrock principles: Freedom. Liberty. And Fear — that someone might take our Freedom and Liberty. But now, there are dark, optimistic forces trying to take away our Fear — forces with salt and pepper hair and way more Emmys than they need. They want to replace our Fear with reason. But never forget — “Reason” is just one letter away from “Treason.” Coincidence? Reasonable people would say it is, but America can’t afford to take that chance.”
This gentleman makes a good point. It’s a Catholic point too. We don’t hear much about fear of the Lord these days, but we all need to fear the lord as the non-elect are going straight to hell and Obama’s evil health care can’t save them. In my day, kids were taught fear with a birch across the backside, or by listening to the John Birch guys. Instead of sitting in the mud and smoking pot and listening to devil’s music, they sat in the mud of Normandy and listened to God’s sacred music of tanks and bombs. But today, they are lazy and gay-ish. They don’t care about the islamofacists, and they couldn’t even locate them on a map. Here’s a hint, sissies, it’s in Iraq, Iran, Afghanistan, France, and Mexico. We need to bring back fear to scare the crap out of these baby liberals, so maybe they can wake up and bomb them. I want my damn country back.
Well, Old Dan might well come to DC for that event. I haven’t been to DC since the days of Herbert Hoover so it might have changed a bit since them. I don’t want to waste my money on hotels, even if it’s still better than taxes, so I might just camp put on the Mall, and cook my food under God’s own starlight. All faithful orthodox readers are welcome to join and sing some good battle songs around the campfire.
Call the Basilica with praise and thanksgiving!!
September 14, 2010
FINALLY! A U.S. Catholic Church willing to promote the truth! Morning’s Mittens over at the apostate “blog” Vox Granola is good for SOMETHING at least… He lets us know that Newton Leroy “Newt” Gingrich, republiteaparty upcomer and shiny brand-new Roman Catholic, will be holding a book signing at the glorious Basilica of the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception this weekend. Of course, Mittens is trying to get all three of his readers to call the Basilica to protest this appearance of that whom can only be the perfect, most utterly perfect, Catholic public figure we have ever did see. And of course, Mittens had absolutely no problem with the Kenyan baby-killer appearing at the University of Notre Shame to pick up his Catholyc seal-of-approval in the form of a Ph.D. degree!!
Yes, the guy has been an adulterer in his distant past. We get it. Yes, he was a sinner. But what the Catholyc liberal baby-killers don’t understand is that he is a repentant sinner. Sure, it took the flashy-flashy of a new shot at the presidency to make him change his disgusting sexual ways. But this is in fact a glorious AMERICAN TRADITION. Look at Ronald Reagan, the former pro-choice politician and Hollywood whore. Look at John McCain, former — and kinda current — pro-choicer and adulterer. This is the pattern, people. This is how GOD WORKS. His Holiness Gingrinch has come home to Holy Mother Church from the Baptists, just as God has planned it. That’s all that counts. His soul has been saved. He is on the right team. So what if he sometimes sounds a little racist? I mean, so what if he ACTUALLY IS racist?! Look at the facts. Gingrich is
1. a good Catholic,
2. is solidly pro-life,
3. is faithful to Benedict XVI: the Pope of Christian Unity
4. he follows the Catechism of the Catholic Church
That’s all there is to it, folks. I mean, why have we not had potential candidates like this before? It is actually very simply to be a good Catholic politician.
The rector of the Basilica Monsignor Walter Rossi should be COMMENDED and PRAISED and MADE A CARDINAL for what he is doing. Catholic Fascists everywhere should email their thanks to him directly at wrr@bnsic.org. Send a nice e-card or something, maybe. If you would like to phone your thanks to him, do so at 202-526-8300. Tell Rossi that you are pleased that Benedict’s Vicar to the United States (forget about that Latino ambassador dude who is probably PRO-CHOICE I forget his name what the heck is it) is being given this holiest of platforms.
Never forget!
September 13, 2010
Well, great. We said we’d never forget 9/11, and we forgot 9/11. Sorry.
Close the border now
September 10, 2010
Joe Hargrave on our sister site has done yeoman’s work in showing the problems of immigration on the southern border, that the liberal latte sipping metrosexual sissies in New York and California don’t care about. And lying heretic bishops like Phony Baloney Mahony don’t get it either. Mother Angelica had your number years ago, heretic.
This is the problem. With open borders, bloodthirsty machete-wielding Mexicans are over running amuck and terrorizing honest God-fearing Americans. They are shooting people and cutting throats with broken tequila bottles. They are cutting off people’s heads and burying them in the desert. The Mexican military is running over the border, and shooting randomly at Americans, because they are all drunk and high on cocaine anyway. The Mexicans gangs have taken over our southern towns. They are pillaging and burning whole towns, and turning them into scnes from Mad Max. They are beheading our men and raping our women, and some of our men too, because most Mexicans are gay. And they are dirty and greasy and never seem to wash, and they throw garbage all over the place. They drive around our streets playing their ugly loud alien music, and if you complain, they’ll run after you with a machete and chop off your head. Mexico is run by the narco terrorists, and soon America will be too if we don’t close the borders.
The only answer is to ban all immigration from Mexico. And don’t you dare tell me that’s racist, as that will make me very very angry. It’s for the common good. The Church teaches that countries can regulate their borders. Let’s face it. America and Mexico have nothing in common. America is based on Judeo-Christian principles in the rational Anglo-Saxon tradition. Mexico is built on anger, emotion, machismo, and blood feuds. You can’t mix the two. And you can’t argue with these people, because they get emotional over every issue and cry racism. Well, sorry, this is not racism and get back to me when you can put the emotion aside and have a reasonable debate. This emotionalism drives me crazy, because I believe in reason and rationality. In fact, it makes me really angry, so angry that I want to pound my head against the wall or go our to the firing range. I want to scream at the stupidity of it all. I am so freaking angry now. AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!